


Season one gang I care you

by Finni_Squid



Category: The Magnus Archives (Podcast)
Genre: Angst, Bisexual Tim Stoker (The Magnus Archives), Elias Bouchard Being a Bastard, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Friendship, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Martin Blackwood Needs a Hug, Multi, Trans Martin Blackwood, Trans Sasha James
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-01
Updated: 2020-07-04
Packaged: 2021-03-04 21:21:40
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,491
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25023088
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Finni_Squid/pseuds/Finni_Squid
Summary: Season one gang did not get enough time together and it upset me so much I yeeted my writing anxiety into the shadow realm and wrote my very first fan fiction. Please be kind to me, I'm always down for some criticism. If you like it let me know so I can continue because I have more in the works.
Relationships: Martin Blackwood & Jonathan "Jon" Sims | The Archivist, Sasha James/Tim Stoker
Comments: 9
Kudos: 47





	1. (•ө•)♡Sasha♡ has created 'The archive crew chat'

_**(•ө•)♡Sasha♡**_ _has created ' **the archive crew chat** '_  
3:23 pm

TimStoker: oh? What's this? A chat for the archives?  
TimStoker: So Jon will never hear our scheming I assume >:)

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: actually because the archives are big and I don't want to yell for you every time I need you to get me something

TimStoker: how d a r e you abuse my services like this

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: :))

 _ **TimStoker**_ _changed their name to **UselessBisexual**_

UselessBisexual: well my name is much more casual now I know Jon isn't gonna be here  
UselessBisexual: wait Martin should be here right?

<3: Oh I'm here!  
<3: I wasn't sure how to join the conversation

UselessBisexual: it wasn't really a conversation

<3: Ah well, you know what I mean

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: we know what you mean Martin  
(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: it's all chill

<3: Wait, shouldn't we add Jon?  
<3: Wouldn't be helpful to have him in the loop for work related-stuff?

UselessBisexual: ugh, I mean, you're right but I don't like it

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: god, even if we wanted him here I don't think it would be helpful  
(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: *even if he wanted to be here

UselessBisexual: lmao that typo was the truth tho

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: you're right but don't say it lol  
(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: but back to what I was saying, do you think he even knows how to use a computer?

<3: Oh come on, he can use a computer.  
<3: I mean, I don't know if he could use a chat room but he's smart, he can learn.

UselessBisexual: how funny do you think it would be if we sent memes like 'S T O N K S' and he just left out of confusion?

<3: Ok that would be funny

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: it really, really would be.

<3: And that's a reason we should add him!

UselessBisexual: It probably would be ngl  
UselessBisexual: but like, this chat is about  
Camaraderie  
UselessBisexual: archival assistant solidarity and all that

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: now that I think about it, I think it would make the process of me going through all of the recorded statements a lot easier.  
(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: he could just send them over here. And in the meantime confuse him with 'newfangled memes'

UselessBisexual: he can't see what we said before he joins right?

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: yeah, yeah it won't be a problem

<3: I would kinda feel bad about it lol?

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: what he can't see won't hurt him >:)

( _ **•ө•)♡Sasha♡**_ _added **Jonathan Sims**_  
 _to ' **The archive crew chat** '_

Jonathan Sims: Um, What is this?

UselessBisexual: a chat for work my dude :)

Jonathan Sims: Who are you 'useless bisexual'?

UselessBisexual: It's Tim

<3: Hello!

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: howdy

Jonathan Sims: I'm assuming Sasha is, well Sasha and is '<3' is Martin?

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: yes

Jonathan Sims: Well, now that I know who everyone is I would like to ask if we need a 'group chat'  
Jonathan Sims: We're all in the same space can't you just come to my office when you need me?

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: the archive is big. I don't want yell for Tim when I want him to help me

Jonathan Sims: You don't have to yell? You can just get up using your perfectly functional legs and ask for him.

UselessBisexual: sure but like, who wants to do that anymore? I have s u p e r important things to do.  
UselessBisexual: like sick kickflips on the collapsed shelves

Jonathan Sims: Tim for the love of God, DO NOT do 'sick flips' on anything in the archives

<3: Those heelys won't move themselves

UselessBisexual: heck yeah they won't!

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: uptop!

Jonathan Sims: Martin please tell me you don't agree with their 'trick flips'

<3: I don't  
<3: But it's fun to joke about :)  
<3: We don't actually do trick flips in the archives

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: we absolutely do

<3: I was trying to cover for you, Gosh

 _ **(•ө•)♡Sasha♡**_ _changed **Jonathan Sims** 's name to **_Grandpa Sim_ s**_

Grandpa Sims: Sasha please change my name back

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: :)

UselessBisexual: jsgdjsgdusgjahs

Grandpa Sims: Tim are you ok? Do you need me to call 999?

UselessBisexual: I'm fine, it's a internet culture thing

Grandpa Sims: God

<3: Ah I remember my first time finding out about key smashing  
<3: Baby me would have never been the same

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: lmao me too  
(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: there comes a time in ever young gays life when the learn of key smashing  
(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: they're never the same after, it's as if they're a completely different person.

Grandpa Sims: Don't you have work to do? Didn't you make this whole thing for work?

UselessBisexual: sadly yes  
UselessBisexual: I will away then  
UselessBisexual: back to my life of suffering  
UselessBisexual: in the dusty archives I call my home

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: you're such a drama queen

 _ **Grandpa Sims**_ _is offline_  
 _4:03 pm_

UselessBisexual: well that was an experience

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: oh shoot I forgot to actually tell him the practical reasons for this chat  
(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: oh well I'll just tell him next time I see him in person

<3: That gave me such a weird rush or adrenaline

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: Cyber bullying your crush or??

<3: You know he isn't my crush  
<3: He's so rude  
<3: I don't like rude people  
<3: I bring him tea as a formality

UselessBisexual: mm you're being real convincing

<3: Oh come off it Tim  
<3: I made one joke ok?

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: you called him cute as a joke  
(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: but you only said it was a joke after you got embarrassed

<3: >:(  
<3: I'm gonna go make tea  
<3: I'll come back when I'm not being bullied by my coworkers

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: lmao ok, could you make me some?

<3: Of course I will  
<3: Don't get me wrong I'm still angy

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: ok lol, thanks for the tea :))

_**< 3** and **(•ө•)♡Sasha♡** are offline 4:07 pm_

UselessBisexual: day one of chat, a huge success

_**UselessBisexual** is offline_   
_4:07 pm_

_**< 3** is online_

<3: Hey Sasha?  
<3: Do you think you could delete those (and these messages I guess lol) about me having a crush on Jon?  
<3: I don't know what I would do if he thought I had a crush on him

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡ is online

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: Martin it's like, 1 in the morning lmao

<3: Sorry it's just,, late night thinking you know?

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: don't worry about it, I know how it is

_**(•ө•)♡Sasha♡** deleted 16 messages_

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: there you go :)

<3: thanks :)

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: of course! Now please get some sleep

<3: mhm I will!  
<3: Goodnight

(•ө•)♡Sasha♡: goodnight

_**< 3** and **(•ө•)♡Sasha♡** are offline_   
_1:27 am_


	2. Creeper, aw man. So, we back in the mine?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Sasha notices a mysterious member of the chat no one added and the gang talks about Minecraft and using it to live the millennial fantasy of a stable finatial life.

**_Grandpa Sims_ ** _ is online _

**_Grandpa Sims_ ** : Tim could you please bring me the box labeled 03 - 06 3

**_UselessBisexual_ ** _ is online _

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : ooh look at Grandpa Sims using the chat! 

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : and sure thing boss!

**_Grandpa Sims_ ** : Tim dont call me 'Grandpa Sims' it's embarrassing and very unprofessional

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : sure thing Grandaddy Sims

**_< 3_ ** _ is online  _

**_< 3_ ** : good morning!

**_Grandpa Sims_ ** : Tim I swear to God 

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : I'm just messing with you lol

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : please don't take it too seriously

**_< 3_ ** : Wow what a time to join the chat 

**_< 3_ ** : Tea to defuse tension? I'm happy to make some :)

**_Grandpa Sims_ ** : Yes we know Martin

**_Grandpa Sims_ ** : And no thank you 

**_< 3_ ** : Okie dokie

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : me and Sasha will have some tea! All of this stapling is making our hands cramp lol

**_Grandpa Sims_ ** : Aren't you supposed to get that box for me?

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : yes yes I'm on it 

**_UselessBisexual_ ** _ is offline _

8:50 am

**_< 3_ ** : Are you sure you don't want any tea Jon?

**_Grandpa Sims_ ** : Yes Martin, I'm sure. 

**_< 3_ ** : Alright,, if you insist

**_Grandpa Sims_ ** : And could you please ask Sasha to change my name back?

**_< 3_ ** : You can change it yourself

**_Grandpa Sims_ ** : I can? 

**_< 3_ ** : Mhm! You just go to the chat settings and under options you can change your name

**_Grandpa Sims_ ** _ changed their name to  _ **_Jonathan Sims_ **

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : Well, thank you Martin

**_< 3_ ** : Of course! 

**_< 3_ ** : it is my job to help after all

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : I'm going to go back to work

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** _ is offline _

_ 8:59 am _

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** _ 's private messages _

**_< 3_ ** : God,, this whole 'crush on Jon' thing is so unfortunate

**_< 3_ ** : I can't even figure out if it's a proper crush or just me wanting to get close to someone who is very emotionally unavailable

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : relationships are just complicated like that

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : I 100% agree that your little crush is super unfortunate. The dude is so mean to all of us but especially you

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : I think something about your joy of existence rubs his old man heart the wrong way 

**_< 3_ ** : Hahaha, if only it felt like that. Just kinda feels like I'm a burden

**_< 3_ ** : A burden for doing my job for gods sake!

**_< 3_ ** : Just,, ughh. Thanks for listening :)

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : of course! Me and Tim are here for you

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : I need to get back to stapling or Jon's psychic powers for knowing when people aren't working will go off and he'll look at me very annoyed when he walks by

**_< 3_ ** : lol fair 

**_< 3_ ** : See you at lunch then 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** _ is offline _

_ 9:01 am _

\-------------------------------------------

**_UselessBisexual_ ** _ is online _

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : do you think we could make a Minecraft server for the archives?

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : ok that would be so good?

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : I know we have our server but it would be fun to have one with Martin!

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : yeah! Do you think Martin plays Minecraft?

**_< 3_ ** : I do! 

**_< 3_ ** : I've been playing since it came out

**_< 3_ ** : But I haven't really been able to pick it up since like,, 2013?

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : oh bro us too!

**_< 3_ ** : Honestly I didn't know you and Sasha where so close lol

**_< 3_ ** : You guys have a server together?

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : we've been playing together for as long as we've know each other

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : we have a pretty impressive world if I do say so myself

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : yeah Sasha basically taught me how to make automated mega farms 

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : she basically has the whole world in redstone wizardry lmao

**_< 3_ ** : Oh wow

**_< 3_ ** : That's just making me realize how even for as long as I've been playing I am not very advanced

**_< 3_ ** : I mostly just like to live out my millennial fantasy of having my own house 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : god don't we all

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : except my house is fully automated and hidden underground

**_< 3_ ** : Just living in a nice cottage with a farm would be so nice 

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : farming is so satisfying isn't it? 

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : normally repetitive actions drive my up a wall but Minecraft farming is just chill

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : I definitely prefer to be the one to fill out the maps tho

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : to live out my millennial fantasy of going on vacation more than once a year

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : ahh yeah

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : we have it better than other places

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : Americans hardly get enough for college let alone vacation

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : at least we aren't Americans lol

**_< 3_ ** : True True

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : my millennial fantasy of uh,,, having my house filled to the brim with handmade engineering? 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : I can't say Minecraft is my source of wish fulfillment 

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** _ is online _

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : My source of wish fulfillment is when my assistants do their job instead of playing Minecraft

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : At least talk about it when I can't hear you

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : dang we've been busted 

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : guess that means no archive Minecraft server huh

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : I can't stop you. Just please be a bit smarter about it next time?

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : And if I catch you playing at work I will inform Elias

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : got it

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : Gotcha 

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : you're a lot chiller about it than I would have expected

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : Yes well, 

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : I don't know it just seems like you should have something for archival Assistant solidarity? 

**_< 3_ ** : Oh that's funny!

**_< 3_ ** :They used that exact phrase before they added you

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : I suppose that is kind of a funny coincidence

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : Regardless, you are useful to me and so I would like to not have you fired 

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : it's not like you can get rid of us even if you wanted too lmao

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : we've been bonded 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : you're basically stuck with us forever

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : unless one of us dies or something

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : which won't happen because me and Sasha have sacrificed our souls for immortality

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : heck yeah we have

**_< 3_ ** : Hey can we not joke about one of us dying?

**_< 3_ ** : I really don't want to think about you guys dying lol

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : oh fair

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : my bad lol

**_< 3_ ** : It's ok, just family issues

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : your good, I've been there 

  
  
  


**_UselessBisexual_ ** _ 's private messages _

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : hey

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : I don't think you have but have you or Martin added anyone to the chat?

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : um,, no?

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : why?

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : well I don't think Jon knows how to add people

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : well, I was checking the settings and such as I wanted to change a few things. Mostly wanted to be so Jon couldn't change his name back from grandpa Sims 

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : lmao yeah

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : but on the list of people there was a blank space right in-between everyone else's names 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : at first I thought a name just didn't load in but everyone was accounted for. So I reset everything and came back to it and it was still there

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : do you think it could be because we're using institute computers? 

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : oh god if Elias is reading our Minecraft chat I'm gonna scream lmao

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : I've considered but I'm using my laptop to run things so he shouldn't be able to see it

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : man, I'm not sure

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : do you think we should make a new chat?

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : no I don't think we need too

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : at least not until I figure out if I can trace them or not 

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : good call

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : should we tell the rest of the chat so they don't like,, put personal info in there

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : I don't think they would just put personal info in there anyways bc we're the only ones who are close but it's probably a good call

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : alright, I'll send a message

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : maybe what ever is reading the chat knowing we know they're there will freak then out eh?

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : give them a little spook?

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : haha yeah

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : that would be kinda hilarious of they got scared off 

**_The Archive Crew Chat_ **

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : hey uh we have an uninvited guest in our chat so be careful about what you say till Sasha figures out what's up

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : it shouldn't be difficult just don't be stupid 

**_< 3_ ** : Oh uh, yikes?

**_< 3_ ** : Maybe we shouldn't use the chat anymore

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : it very well could just be a technical error so I'm not worried about it

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : Sasha is good at this sort of thing I trust her 

**_< 3_ ** : If you guys insist

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : we do work at a paranormal investigation institute

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : at this point the feeling of being watched by strange and stranger creatures shouldn't be too weird right?

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : especially after you've worked in artifact storage lol

**_< 3_ ** : I guess that's just how it is around here 

**_< 3_ ** : Maybe I'm just oblivious but I don't feel watched?

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : neither do I lol 

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : I was making a joke about ghost stories 

**_< 3_ ** : Ah I see

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : ha see

**_< 3_ ** : maybe we can talk more about it in person

**_< 3_ ** : I don't know if I'm ok with being watched

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : we can have an archive meeting if Sasha says it could actually be important

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : it could just be Elias on the institute wifi

**_< 3_ ** : God I don't know if that's more or less comforting

**_< 3_ ** : I think I'd rather have some creepy stranger reading this than my boss's boss

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : lmao yeah

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : he doesn't need to know about me and Tim's heely incident 

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : oh god

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : do you think that would be enough to get us fired?

**_< 3_ ** : I mean probably

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : at least me and Sasha are good at our jobs

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : I wouldn't say that's my one saving grace

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : Tim on the other hand, probably

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : I want to be mad but you're right

**_< 3_ ** : Hey! I'm not bad at my job

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : you're the emotional heart of the team Martin

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : you're plenty helpful Martin 

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : even if you aren't great at your job

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : god Tim be tactful

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : sorry! I didn't mean to come off as rude

**_< 3_ ** _ is offline _

_ 5:36 pm _

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : look what you did you big oaf

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : i didn't mean to be rude!

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : I know you didn't but Martin doesn't

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : just apologize ok?

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : yeah I guess you're right

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : I'll go do that

**_UselessBisexual_ ** _ is offline _

_ 5:39 _


	3. Minecraft and chill

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Lmao sorry ive had this in ready for a hot minute but i didn't know how to end it and also i kept forgetting to update. This fic is gonna stagnate bc like, my adhd said no lol

**_UselessBisexual_ ** _ is online _

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : hey guys it's 4:20

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : nice

**_< 3_ ** : nice

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : What?

**_UselessBisexual_ ** _ is offline _

_ 4:20 _

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : you don't know why 4:20 is??

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : Of course I know what 4:20 is I wasn't born yesterday

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : I don't see why Tim needed to message all of us to celebrate the smoking of marijuana

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : ok boomer

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : I'm barely older than you

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : boomer is more of a mindset than an age

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : Elias is a boomer, I'm 27

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : If that's the case I don't think I have that same entitlement that would classify someone as a boomer

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : wkegwiwgiegdiwhwkdhue

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : LMAO 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : and yes I know, I'm just pulling your leg

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : What was funny about it?

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : oh just you calling Elias a boomer is really funny to me

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : That makes sense

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : and gosh you do not look 27

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : I still have a hard time believing it

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : Yes, I know my grey hair is shocking

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : yeah it really is

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : like, what stress has caused this?? Will we ever know? 

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** :You won't

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : it wasn't a serious question lol

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : Let's just say there's a reason I don't care for spiders

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : Oh you were joking?

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : My bad

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : ö oooooo is the mystery backstory being revealed??

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : No it is not

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : a shame

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : this was not as satisfying as that time you accidentally let us know you know what vines are

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : It was appropriate for the timing 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : Still hilarious

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : I need to record a statement, do you need anything from me before I leave?

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : nah, thanks tho

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** _ is offline _

_ 4:29 _

\---------------------------------------

**_UselessBisexual_ ** _ 's private messages _

**_< 3_ ** : Hi, I just wanted to say thank you for apologizing the other day

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : yeah, of course man

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : I really didn't mean to come off as rude

**_< 3_ ** : I know, I was upset as well so it didn't help much

**_< 3_ ** : It was a bad dysphoria day, mom issues again

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : yeah, it's not something I can understand

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : but like, I can totally empathize ya know?

**_< 3_ ** : Thanks

**_< 3_ ** : Just frustrating is all

**_< 3_ ** : I didn't need to get mad at you when you tried to apologise and I shouldn't make excuses for it so, I'm also sorry

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : apology accepted 

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : we good?

**_< 3_ ** : Yeah we're good

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : awesome! I'll see you later on the Minecraft server!

**_< 3_ ** : Alrighty! Send me a reminder when you are logging in

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : np dude

**_< 3_ ** _ is offline _

_ 12:46 pm _

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : hey! We're about to start playing soon! 

**_< 3_ ** : Thanks for letting me know!

**_< 3_ ** : I'll be on in a sec

9:30 pm

**_The archive crew chat_ **

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : y'all ready to play?

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : yup! I messaged Martin and he's logged on and ready to go

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : epic

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : I'm ready to commit every Minecraft sin

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : you don't mean,,

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : you don't DARE

**_UselessBisexual:_ ** **mine at night??**

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : exactly that

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : I am too good at the game 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : I need risk in my life Tim smh

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : so bold, so brave

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : I admire your admiration

**_< 3_ ** : Oh wow, Sasha is really living on the edge in this world!

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : oh yeah I am

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : don't even get me started on digging straight down

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : hot take

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : digging straight down is a perfectly valid way to mine and y'all are just infants 

**_< 3_ ** : Harsh! 

**_< 3_ ** : I literally cried last time I heard a cave sounds, how do you even..

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : I live life on the edge ;)

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : but yeah you won't mine at night?

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : look

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : I fear no mortal man, but this thing,, it scares me

**_< 3_ ** : Are we actually gonna play or are you guys just gonna argue about Minecraft sins lol?

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : yeah we've got the server up and running and it's really to join!

**_< 3_ ** : Awesome! 

**_< 3_ ** : This spawn point is so cute? 

**_< 3_ ** : it's kinda basic but flower forests are so nice! 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : right? The theme is definitely gonna be like, cottage core

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : until I can find a cool mountain to create a fortress or something

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : I think I'm gonna do a treehouse

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : it's would be super cool to have a network of trees connected around the whole forest

**_< 3_ ** : I'm just excited to build a cottage with a nice but stable farm

**_< 3_ ** : I just enjoy a nice place to build

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : so I take it Tim is gonna find me my mountain and Martin is gonna be good at landscaping

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : I can see bright things for this server ( ꈍᴗꈍ)

10:02 pm

**_< 3_ ** : Ah shit it's nighttime

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : did I just hear what I think I heard??

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : Martin blackwood? Using a curse? 

**_< 3_ ** : No

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : crisis averted 

**_< 3_ ** : OH GOD 

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : "SpiderPrince was blown up by a creeper" LMAO

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : rip to Martin but I'm different 

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : yeah you ran straight into a ravine

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : look I am a woman on a mission to find the perfect cave for my new home do you have a problem sir

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : you saw iron and went "mINE"

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : and then died lmao

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : lOOK 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : i want iron and diamonds are probably available in that ravine so naturally I dive directly into it 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : I just get to the shiny stuff faster 

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : yeah well now your legs are broken

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : they aren't actually because I'm just back at spawn :)

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : alone

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : in the dark

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : with a mob staring directly at me (• ▽ •;)

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : lmao tp to me

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : I am not a cheater Tim

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : ok coward

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : hey uh, Martin has been afk for a while?

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : oh yeah 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : I've been busy not dying lmao

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : the chat had just been filled with "SpiderPrince has died" messages bc he's respawning and getting killed bc hes afk lmao

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : it's kinda hilarious lmao

**_< 3_ ** : HI! I'm back!

**_< 3_ ** : Sorry there were some worms on my desk so I spent a minute trying to kill them 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : oh worm?

**_< 3_ ** : It was gross :')

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : I will personally come and beat up those worms with my huge meat fists 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : hi I have basically beat the game 

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : bullshit

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : it's been like, an hour?

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : haven't I taught you anything?

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : people have beaten this game in like, 3 minutes

**_< 3_ ** : I'm??? What???

**_< 3_ ** : There is no way that's even possible

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : oh it's possible

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : you haven't even gotten the nether achievement

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : I can't believe Sasha is lying to us :/ 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : ok well it's only been like what? one day?

**_< 3_ ** : What happened to 3 minutes Sasha?

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : 3 minutes wouldn't be fun for a long term server 

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : mm is it now

**_UselessBisexual_ ** : I smell defense

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : lmao sure 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** _ changed  _ **_UselessBisexual_ ** _ 's name to  _ **_Minecraft purest_ **

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : WOW

**_Minecraft purest_ ** _ : _ this is so rude

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : I wasn't the one like "I won't teleport because that's cheating :(("

**_< 3_ ** : sjeguwgehwgshjajs

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : I'm changing my name lol

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** _ changed  _ **_Minecraft purest_ ** _ 's permissions _

_ 12:58 am _

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : no :)

**_< 3_ ** : This is so good 

**_< 3_ ** : This is a great time haha!

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : Sasha 1v1 me right now

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : winner loses name change permissions

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : I'm the admin I can't lose name change permissions

**_< 3_ ** : Neither can Tim

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : I have nothing to lose sasha

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : Martin will ref

**_< 3_ ** : I'll have blackmail :))

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : wow ok

**_< 3_ ** : Oh wow Sasha has full armor already

**_< 3_ ** : Tim is screwed lol

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : OH

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : OH GOD SHE DOES

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : I've been busy trying to build like a basic home and sahsa is fucking powerhousing through

**_< 3_ ** : wkshuwgeuehwuehj "Coolguysyndrome has been slain by CottageWhore" I'm crying

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : Tim you overconfident fool I have slaine thee

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** _ is online _

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : What happened to this being a work chat?

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : A work chat we all suspected of Elias being able to read?

1:27 am

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : sup boss man

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : well it's not like we're at work so he can't get mad at us for playing Minecraft as friends on a Saturday night 

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : Yes but we really should stick to this being for work or else every time you open it you'll think of the opposite

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : don't worry about it! 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : we know not to play Minecraft at work

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : I doubt Tim will

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : Rude! 

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : I'm great at staying on task

**_< 3_ ** : Oh come on

**_< 3_ ** : We will stop Tim from Minecrafting at work

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : You really are not good at staying on task

**_< 3_ ** : Tim is probably the best at doing his due diligence so even if he does its not like its hes trying to not work.

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : Martin you're taking too long to type and the sun is setting I'd get inside

**_< 3_ ** : Oh shoot ok

**_< 3_ ** : HNNNGGG IM SO FAR AWAYYY

**_< 3_ ** : Oh ok so I only see spiders

**_< 3_ ** : They don't really attack right?

**_< 3_ ** : OH THEY DON'T ATTACK DURING THE DAY

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : AKSHWIAHAJJA

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : Can we please stay on the subject at hand

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : you know I bet you would be happier if you just played with us

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : I don't know what Minecraft even is

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : when you craft a mine

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : idk I've never played Minecraft I'm too pretty

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : That isn't what I meant

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : I know lol

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : it's one of those me me s

**_< 3_ ** : Does Jon even know what a meme is?

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : he knows what vines are so I'm sure he knows what memes are

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : of course I know what a meme is 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : how can we be sure

**_Jonathan Sims:_ **

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : I can feel the sharp inhale

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : 

**_< 3_ ** : oh no

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : oh no! My memories of what a meme is 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : they're fading!!

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : how do I know if I know what a meme is??

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : I can't believe Jon Uno reverse carded the memory of memes out of our dearest Sasha lmao 

**_< 3_ ** : she's fading :((

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : Who's Sasha?

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : This is the power I hold

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : oh god

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : I'm Jon now. I don't know what a meme is 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : Why are you playing Minecraft at 1:38 am?

**_< 3_ ** : siwgwuhejabsje

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : does that mean the new Sasha is gonna play Minecraft with us??

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : No

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : No

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : come on sahsa you know you wanna play with us

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : I don't actually

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** _ changed their name to  _ **_NotSasha™_ **

**_NotSasha™_ ** _ has changed _ **_Jonathan Sims_ ** _ name to  _ **_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ **

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : I can change my own name now

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : oh god don't test her 

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : she already took my permissions 

**_NotSasha™_ ** _ changed  _ **_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** _ 's permissions _

**_NotSasha™_ ** : I am not a just god

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : God damnit

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : It is too early for this 

**_< 3_ ** : I guess the only answer is for Jon to play Minecraft with us

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : No

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : coward

**_< 3_ ** : We have a great system set up

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : mhm, 

**_Minecraft purest_ ** it's communism

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : While that sounds fun and dandy I don't know how to play or what to play on and I don't want too

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : I actually would like to be asleep right now 

**_NotSasha™_ ** : ☭ 

**_NotSasha™_ ** : shame 😔😔

**_< 3_ ** : Just go to bed then?

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : You were blowing up the chat I had to at least see what was going on

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : wow, I can't believe our beloved archivist cares about us

**_NotSasha™_ ** : y'all feeling the love

**_< 3_ ** : i am :))

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : I don't love any of you stop

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : that just isn't true

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : we know you love us boss man

**_NotSasha™_ ** : of course he does

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : I don't

**_< 3_ ** : I am going to agree with Sasha and Tim and agree that you do love us 

**_NotSasha™_ ** : what's not to love about us

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : we are the most loveable

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : also having two Sashas is getting confusing lol

**_< 3_ ** : Yeah but it's funny

**_NotSasha™_ ** : I guess lol

**_NotSasha™_** _has changed_ ** _(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_** _'s name to_ ** _Jonathan Sims_**

2:00 am

**_NotSasha™_ ** _ has changed their name to  _ **_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ **

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : better? Lol

**_< 3_ ** : I miss all of the Sasha's lol

**_< 3_ ** : But at least we know who's who

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : a shame 😔😔

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : lmao Martin is still super afk in Minecraft

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : I don't think he's moved from our little house since he moved over the first time he went afk 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : something about worms?

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : That's a shame

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : Maybe you will stop messaging the chat and let me sleep in peace

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : just mute your phone old man

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : we aren't just going to stop playing lol

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : he hasn't logged off and even if he has we can just play by ourselves

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : Well, that would be a better solution than just hoping you go to bed soon

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** : Goodnight everyone

**_Jonathan Sims_ ** _ is offline _

2:10

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : ding dong the witch is dead

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : lmao

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : Martin is still gone tho 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : yeahh

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : he hasn't gone offline so I'm sure he's still like, reading this or at least on his phone

**_< 3_ ** : ah hi yes! I'm still here I'm just feeling really ill all of a sudden

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : oh damn

**_Minecraft purest_ ** : well, take care, stay hydrated, all that jazz

**_< 3_ ** : Thanks, I'm probably gonna go to bed for the night 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : ah darn, well, like Tim said, take care!

**_< 3_ ** : mhm thanks!!

**_< 3_ ** : is offline

2:13

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : well, i assume we’re gonna keep playing yeah?

**_MinecraftPurest_ ** : sure! I'm still wide awake

**_MinecraftPurest_ ** : well, wide awake its an overstatement

**_MinecraftPurest_ ** : im kinda slipping 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : you don't have gamer fuel on hand? 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : smh 

**_MinecraftPurest_ ** : that shits nasty and you know it. I bet you wouldn't even touch it with a 5 foot pole

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : lmao yeah I wouldn't 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : but, I also like not falling asleep during minecraft and chill

**_MinecraftPurest_ ** : ohoh, minecraft and chill you say? 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : ｛・ω- }

**_MinecraftPurest_ ** : not to put a damper on anything but like, we've already done that lol 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : im well aware tim lol. I wasnt trying to rekindle anything 

**_MinecraftPurest_ ** : ok! Its just kinda hard for me to tell

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : yeah i get it. Its no big deal

**_MinecraftPurest_ ** : well, back to cottagecore cottage making? 

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : yes lol

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : i found some neat shells in a chest and i think they would look cool if we hung them up on item frames 

**_MinecraftPurest_ ** : mmm yesss. We can put some flowers and leaves and stuff 

**_MinecraftPurest_ ** : I was not expecting to get this into cottagecore 

**_MinecraftPurest_ ** : its just so soft,,, and cozy

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : join me in cozy cottage hell

**_(•ө•)♡Sasha♡_ ** : its the land of the gays 

**_MinecraftPurest_ ** : speaking of land of the gays, kinda fun how queer our fellow archival staff are yeah? 


End file.
